Oh. My. God.
I had the option of picking a grade-appropriate project for each class (grade-appropriate project packets in the sub folder) or watching a film
Like a crazy lady, I decided to do the projects.
Kindergarteners made construction paper butterflies. Some did not understand when I said "Make the wings nice and big, like this!" and showed them an example that I meant "Don't make the wings an inch long and half an inch wide, like Jimmy!"
The 5th grade project was fun, at least. We did Cubism. I managed to draw a very quick, simplistic face on a piece of paper before they came in, and draw 7 lines through it, and then color some of the spaces different colors before they came in. I told them (pointing to my half-assed sketched-on face, which a 6th grader could do) that I wasn't much of an artist. I found it gratifying when, a few minutes later, a boy said "Did you draw that?"
The girl next to him responded, "No, it was just there. It magically appeared on the paper."
And he said, "Well, she said she wasn't much of an artist!"
I said, "Oh, do you think I did a good job?" and the class chorused "YES!" I said, "Oh. Well, apparently I am an artist," and left it at that.
I didn't like any of the project options for 3rd grade (they all involved folding) and so I let them do a free draw and watch a video about Van Gogh. I told them that he cut off part of his ear and they all went "EWWWW!" then I told them that the video did not show him cutting off his ear, and they all went "Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww." There was just no winning. But they all quietly drew and watched the video. It was nice.
Then lunch, a quick trip to the bathroom, and I was back in the room, making sure I had enough paper for my next group of Kindergarteners and making sure I new what I wanted to do with the 1st graders.
The second grade did something sort of like the Cubism project my 5th graders did, but instead of doing a picture, they did a large "open scribble" on their paper and then filled each white space with a different pattern. I got a lot of "Is this shape okay? Is this shape okay? What is this shape?"
One girl had drawn some sort of shape that was bulbous on one end, then tapered to a wiggly line on the other end. "What is this shape?"
I had to bite my lip to keep from saying, "That's sperm, honey."
6th grade did something called "Wipeout," which was basically just pattern-drawing as well. They were okay, but I'm glad I only had one half-hour of them.
Then came bumbum BUUUUM the 1st graders. I really didn't like the project options for them, either, but I didn't really want to do videos again because most of the options were half-hour things and I didn't want to switch halfway through the class.
We did construction paper Circlecone Turtles.
I...I can't even talk about it. Ever.
Well, it wasn't that bad, I guess, but there were a lot of kids, and it's a pretty involved project, and I hadn't had time to make up an example. So...yeah.
My throat has been hurting since Sunday (slept with the window open Saturday night, and it got really cold) but it felt better this morning. Now it's worse than before, from all the "BOYS AND GIRLS, YOU SHOULD NOT BE TALKING" that I did.
In other news, Waterford is certainly the district for twins. This was a different school than the one I've been subbing in the past few days. In my first Kindergarten class, there was a little boy (Ktwin 1) who had an aide with him. He may have been autistic, but I'm not sure. He didn't speak very clearly and he was sort of hyper. Anyway, so he was in my first class.
When it was time for my next Kindergarten class, after lunch, he was suddenly in my room again while his class lined up outside, waiting for me to let them come in.
Boy: *to me* MEEGLE MEEGLE MEEGLE!*
Boy: MEEGLE MEEGLE! *literally throws himself at my midriff for a hug*
Me: Oomph. Ooookay, then, Ktwin 1. Erm...didn't I already have you in a class today? *notices the boy's pencil box has a different name on it than Ktwin 1*
Aide: *enters room*
Me: Does he have a twin?
Aide: Yep! Identical.
And there you have it. More twins.
Anyway, I'm feeling kind of snarky, and Keels was just reading over my shoulder ("Meggle meggle meggle?") to which I replied "MEEGLE. Note the double-Es." She looked offended, so I said, "I'm sorry. I'm mean today. I need to be smacked." And she said "OKAY" and smacked me on the shoulder.
OH THE INJUSTICE.
*For the purposes of this entry, meegle meegle meegle is a sort of incoherent, happy-sounding yelling.