November 10th, 2007


Ar - ar - AR-TI-CLE. AR-TI-CL-E. What's in the middle? ME!

Got a couple articles for you today. I'll do the sad one first.

This guy spent his day beating a toddler. He slapped him, slammed his head against the floor, shook him, put a lot of pressure on his chest, then when the child started seizing up, the guy thought he was choking and tried to pry his mouth open with a can opener. Guys, I don't know what's wrong with the world.

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This article is considerably more amusing, though not entirely is, after all, about stealing candy from a baby. Well, several babies. And when I say 'babies,' I mean kids. Still, what kind of idiot do you have to be to steal candy from children on Halloween? AT GUNPOINT? IN TALKEETNA?

This kind.

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Well, of COURSE you're going to grow up crazy, if you have the last name Butts. All of those scars left over from middle school...that's what made her rob the children!

Still, these ladies could get 180 years in prison for stealing candy, while the jackass above them can only get 30 years for almost killing a toddler? Seem odd to anyone else?