kokopellinelli (kokopellinelli) wrote,

Okay. I used to work for a boat tour company in Alaska as a crew member. It was a lot of fun, and most of the people who took the tours were very nice. However, there were a few exceptions.

One day, the weather was extremely crappy. Valdez (the town I worked in) is a rainforest, so it rains all the time. This summer it was actually really dry, but we did have some bad days. Anyway, as a result of all the rain, we only cancelled tours if the seas were really bad. If it was just foggy or rainy, we went ahead with the trip.

Anyway, so it was a foggy day. We did manage to see some wildlife, animals that we saw pretty much every day--otters, sea lions, eagles, seals--and we saw both glaciers we went to see. Columbia had fog around and above it, but it was still visible.

On this particular tour, we served two meals, one on the way out and one on the way in. While we were in the galley making the soup for the second meal, a middle-aged lady comes back and complains that she's freezing and can't we turn up the heat. Nina, the crew chief that day, told her that the heat was up as high as it could go. Then the lady wants us to close the door by the galley, which we have to keep propped open when we're cooking, otherwise all the windows fog up, including the ones upstairs so the captain can't see to drive.

Nina explained this to here, and the woman started going off, saying we should be making her comfortable (there were about a hundred other people on the boat that day, and she was the ONLY one complaining) and that she was a victim of false advertising, because she hadn't seen anything the brochure had advertised, the glaciers or the wildlife. Nina replied, "Actually ma'am, the brochure guarantees you will see glaciers, which we did see, and that you might see wildlife, which we also saw."

The lady replied, "I meant real wildlife!" Um, okay.

So, anyway, this lady's blah blah blah-ing about how she's cold and miserable and the boats shouldn't run on days like this, and we're horrible people and she wants to speak to the manager, so Nina tells her she's welcome to talk to Manager A when we get to port.

We get to port and the lady stalks off the boat, towing her husband behind her and leaving a nasty little note in the log, and motors up to the office.

Now, this company is run by two managers, A and C, and C is the owner's daughter. They are both some of the coolest people in the world. C is a peacemaker, and A tells it like it is. Luckily for us (haha) A is the one who got to handle this woman. She had quickly run the other passengers back to their hotels and RV camps before taking the complaint, and asked the passengers about their day to see if it was really as horrid as the lady said, because if it was, she would probably just give the lady her refund. Everyone on the bus assured her they'd had a wonderful time, and had seen both glaciers and some animals.

CL-Complaining Lady

CL-This was the most horrible day of my life. I can't believe I spent money for this. That crew was horrible and refused to turn on the heat, I was cold, I was bored, and I didn't see anything.

A-Actually, ma'am, I talked to some of the other passengers and they said they saw everything we advertised.

CL-*outraged* Are you calling me a liar??

A-Well...yeah. I guess I am.

CL-How can you treat people like this? If the weather is bad, you should just cancel the trip!

A-If we cancelled a trip every rainy or foggy day, we would go out of business.

(I love this part) CL-What are you talking about?? I've been here before, it never rains!!

A-*speechless for a moment* Well, I guess you haven't been here all that often, then.

CL-*huffs, puffs, makes incoherent noises* I want a refund. And I am never using this company again.

A-Good. My crews aren't paid to put up with people like you. Now I'm going to ask you to leave.

CL-*plants her hands on the desk* Make me.

A-*picks up the phone* 911'll make ya.

Now, I've taken some liberty with the dialogue, as I can't remember it word for word. But is A not the coolest manager ever? Unfortunately, she DID wind up giving the bitch her refund, just to get her out of the office. J, a guy who worked in the office, made a note next to the lady's name in the computer..."BITCH"...and he's like the nicest guy ever.

And, I'm sorry, but we're a rain forest. You come here for vacation for like a week for two years in a row, and you're the expert? Whatever.

  • Grinchy McGrinch'o'Lantern

    Children of Valdez, I am sorry I neglected to pick up candy this year. However, the fact that my porch light is off tonight means I will not be…

  • Microsot needs more tequila

    I just received a message in my junk folder from "Microsot" saying that my email ID was chosen for something. I deleted it, of course, but I couldn't…

  • No Way But Up

    Hello, everyone. This is my mom's book. By that, I mean she wrote it. She's been working on it for 15 years. It's about my dad's time in the…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic
    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.